I hadn't known my husband for more than two months before he started in on me to have a baby. His constant pestering lead to progressively harsher responses from me, starting from"eventually", "someday", "not me, not now", "leave me alone", to "have your own damn baby".

Last Spring something in me started to shift and I became more and more serious about the possibility of having a baby. After months of internal dialog, I finally gathered the courage to share the news with my husband who was expectedly ecstatic. (I haven't told the dogs yet - they are going to be devastated!)

Sharing the news with Loren, my husband, opened the flood gates and I finally started researching what to expect, what to eat, what to do to prepare, and what the birthing process would look like....which at first was pretty anxiety provoking, as I started out by watching "The Business of Being Born" (not recommended as a place to start).

Here I plan to document interesting, perception changing information I come across in what will be a successful journey towards a positive pregnancy and childbirth.


Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Today was the DAY.....

...She was supposed to arrive.  February 20th was our predicted due date and unless contractions start and she's miraculously born within the the next 1.5 hours she'll be late.  It seems as though I've made too much of a comfortable home for her.  There is no indication that she has an exit plan as I am showing no signs of labor or even pre-labor.  No contractions. No dilation.  No crampiness.  I don't even know for sure that she's dropped yet.  This waiting game has been a killer.  I was born 3 weeks early which means I've been anticipating her arrival every day since January 30th.  I was sure she'd be here by now.  Loren and I were sitting on the couch watching, ah hem, American Idol and thinking about how she should be here by now - laying on us, not stuck in my belly.

I've been trying everything!  This past weekend Loren and I went to Portland as a way to try to insight some sort of dramatic event like my water breaking half way down there and having to turn around and come back.   We walked and walked and walked...at least it felt like a lot of walking for me.  The most exciting thing that happened was after eating a slice of pizza I got really bad cramps that I thought were contractions for about an hour until I realized it was just horrible gas pains...that's the second time that has happened....must stop eating pizza.

Yesterday I went for two walks, ate spicy food for lunch, tried acupuncture for the first time, bounced on an exercise ball, drank raspberry leaf tea, took a hot bath and NOTHING changed! Today I cleaned the baby room, the bathroom and the floors all morning to feel mentally prepared for her arrival.  Tonight I went to a prenatal yoga class.  Of everything I've done the pre-natal yoga seemed to be the most effective although, deep down, I know that all of this is just one more way to try to take control of a totally uncontrollable process.  She's going to come when she's ready to come and in the meantime I just have to wait, or pretend like I am doing things to help speed the process along.

I'm just hoping not to have to be induced. Since my cervix isn't dilated at all they can't sweep the membranes as a way to get labor going.  I have a feeling having a stubborn cervix might wipe a few of the other natural options off the list as well.   I have an appointment on Friday and am hoping that things will have progressed at least a little by then so that we can start making a plan.

I was so convinced that Liliana would be here early that I was worried we wouldn't be able to finish the parenting class we were taking.  That ended last week and we didn't miss a class.  I wasn't worried about the fact that our doula has a trip to Iceland planned for two weeks starting on the 23rd, although I am now quite sure we aren't going to have her as a support during labor because a) I don't even feel close and b) her sister, who she is also doula'ing for, is at the hospital right now laboring away! I just realized - She stole my due date!!! Obviously I'm kidding and am super happy for her and her husband and hope everything is going as well as possible.  I can't wait to share the experience of being new parents with them and their baby boy.

Our stubborn little stinker also made me lose a bet with my friends from NY who were pregnant at the same time (emphasis on "were").  When I visited last summer Megan and I both announced we were pregnant at the same time and thought we had the same due date (February 16th).  Of course, we had to make a bet on who would have the baby first. They had a Valentine's Day baby who is healthy and cute and I can't wait to meet her this summer!! Speaking of people I can't wait to meet.....Liliana - it's your turn! Get OUT!!!!!


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